The ukulele conspiracy.

So lately Amanda Palmer has been rubbing it in. I mean, she's all over the twitters so I keep being reminded about how she's prancing about Australia when I would really like to be in Australia chasing koalas. (It's on our to do list, for serious.) There's that, but there's also the ongoing thing where she has a ukulele to play with at random and I am currently ukuleleless. This has been coming up far more often than one would ever imagine.

EXHIBIT A:

Amanda Palmer playing one of my favorite uke songs. Sure, this is an oldie but she's still dicking around with one-evidence is abundant. Don't believe me? Just toss "Amanda Palmer ukulele" into the youtubes. It's all over the place.

EXHIBIT B:

Um. I wanna watch the Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain play "Shaft" live! Duh. I think it should be an inalienable right that if you are to find yourself without your own personal ukulele with which to attempt to play shaft yourself, you should be given the opportunity to go see the Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain. Otherwise it's just mean.

EXHIBIT C:

This is John playing his recently acquired ukulele. Now, he is willing to send me videos of him playing the ukulele to me pretty much when ever I demand them. And, yes, I demand them fairly often. And yes, eventually his ukulele will be available for all my ukuleleing needs (of which there are plenty) but right now I CAN'T REACH. This is rude, and this is the outcome:

I think the evidence speaks for itself. There is a conspiracy, and it is aimed at me. The whole world is keeping me from strumming annoyingly at an instrument I have no idea how to play whilst singing aloud at the top of my lungs. And I already have two Nick Cave songs all picked out to ukuleleize too!

So come on, universe. Send me a ukulele. I think I deserve it.

That is all.